Thirteen

Yesterday marked the day that 13 years ago Marcie and I made a covenant in front of the Lord to become one. It wasn't your typical anniversary as we were worn out from our trip, I didn't get the opportunity to talk to my family, we went out as a family to Jim and Nick's with a shake from Dairy Queen to top it off, and ending the night with me mowing the yard. Pretty romantic huh?

Didn't seem to matter too much after the weekend as God is enabling us to pass on the faith and Spirit of Jesus to our boys. The cool connection came after we were looking at our wedding and engagement photos with our boys last night. I was laughing at how much we have changed and feeling nostalgic looking at a picture of Grandma Miller kissing me. She readily passed on affection and her faith the best way she knew how and that's what we are trying to do with our boys. There is a generational responsibility I have and as the Spirit works in me, I'm seeking full deliverance from things such as anger that can hurt a marriage. I'm still trying to stay on the path of full deliverance from selfishness but stray from the path at times.

God put me with someone that covers my weaknesses. God put me with someone who's "living" example shows me what peace and servanthood are to look like. God put me with someone who loves me despite my weaknesses and loves me unconditionally. Someone who has a child-like faith to make up for my tendency to need "seeing" to believe...as for her, believing is seeing. I praise God for the strengths He has given me that make Marcie a better person as we both seek God to point out any offensive ways in us and lead us on the path of everlasting life (Psalm 139). It's not easy as marriage is a great crucible to either refine and purify you or it can be a great spontaneous combustion waiting to happen.

Amazing how long it can take sometimes to fully trust your spouse as your "ally" and let them and God refine you into a better person. Marriage is a great test of surrendering and soliciting when it comes to realizing you can't become like Jesus without God and the community around you. That vulnerability has to be risk-taking on both sides and ultimately we surrender our hearts and control to each other and God...this is a daily process that I sometimes struggle with. Children take this to a whole new level!

Although painful at times, I'm enjoying the refining and the veils being removed of how far I have come with Jesus...and veils being removed of what I need to confess and still be delivered from. I truly believe that the deeper levels of intimacy we dare go to in marriage, God will take us to those deeper levels with Him.

As I look back to those times I saw Marcie my freshman year at Harding in those three classes I was prompted to tell Dad, "Remember the name Marcie Fouts". I realize now that was the Spirit leading me as only God could have joined me through the prayers of my parents with someone like her. I praise you God for my wife and for the boys you have blessed us with...I feel so unworthy at times and yet receive fully as You make me worthy and You can do more than I ever asked or imagined. I pray these next 13 years take us from the Glory to Glory that you promised in the New Covenant (2 Cor. 3) as the Spirit makes us more like Jesus. I love you Marcie and want to thank you for loving me as fully like Jesus as a human is capable of. May we pray for our children's future spouse's with faith and a sense of urgency!! In the Name of Jesus...
Todd